MORTALITY

[Kikkers_mum]

Hi everyone,

Like many of us on this site, my collection of animals is reasonably large ( for me, 7 enclosures all up) and over time, I've unfortuntely had a few pass away . This is to the absolute disgust of my partner who has deemed me an unfit pet owner which has upset me immensely.

I was wondering whether anyone else on this site has been criticised in a similar fashion by their loved ones, and what people's experiences have been with animal mortality in terms of numbers?

I love all my animals and feel distraught and ashamed of myself when they pass on - What I really want to know is whether I really am unfit to keep my animals or whether its just an unfortunate fact of life that animals pass away?

Honest opinions will be very much appreciated

Thankyou

[soulweaver]

not ever had this happen.

but what did they pass from? if it is old age or something like that then how can u be blamed?

[BeardyBen]

If you feel you have done all you can and answer that question honestly then dont have any regrets at all.

[Kikkers_mum]

Thanks Souly

A couple have been from old age, a couple from shedding problems. One from an infection.

Whether I can be blamed or not, I still feel awful about it!!

[Kikkers_mum]

Yes, you're right Ben. I am still new to this game and have a lot to learn.

Thanks for your opinion.

[soulweaver]

You always will, which i think makes you a better animal owner. If you didn't care and went meh i will just buy another then it shows all you care about is the cash involved in getting reptiles.

We did all we coudl for a coastal carpet, probably upwards of $2000 to try and save its life and work out what was wrong. As a result in the end we had to elect to put it too sleep. Both of us feel very bad for having to do this, but at the end of the day we couldn't do anything else.

if you do all you can to save the animal, then there should be no regrets. Everyone has their own opinions and unfortunatly sometimes they arn't the same as yours and/or could be harsh.

like BB just said if you can say to your self honsetly that you did all you could, then there should be no issue

[Vat69]

What a sad thing to have been put on you
Like the others have said it's obvious you care about your animals so I can't see where your partner's opinion is comming from.
I know it means less comming from us than what is comming from your partner, but losing animals just happens some times. And it's going to continue happening in yours and everyone else's collections. There's nothing you can do about it, and of course you'll always feel bad when it happens, but being made feel worse unnecessarily by someone close to you is so unfair. I really hope they pull their finger out and realise this for your sake.

[OuZo]

I feel the same...absolutely devastated if one of our pets dies and have always felt some sort of responsibility even though none (so far thank god) have ever been due to any fault of our own. I think one thing you have to remember is the amount of animals we're talking about here...the more you have the more likely it is you're going to have some die...that's just life. Try not to beat yourself up too much over it, as others have said if you feel happy that you've done the best you can then there's nothing left to feel bad about except for sadness that they're not with you anymore

[Kikkers_mum]

Thankyou Vat69 and Ouzo

For a long time I felt like I was the only person who kept herps who was having a really bad run. Like I said before, I am still learning, and thankfully I am learning from my mistakes and being more aware of what I am doing wrong and asking for help when I run into trouble.

None of us are perfect but so long as we are honest with ourselves and try our best that is all that we can do. I guess feelings of guilt and sadness do fade after a while but the lesson learnt is the most important thing.

Thankyou so much once again

[GARTHNFAY]

When it comes to pets.....you are ALWAYS going to have disasters.....don't beat yourself up over it.....as long as you can say that you did what you thought was right at the time!! It is a learning process (sometimes a very tough one) and you can NEVER learn enough!!!

[Jarvis78]

Ive had a bad run over the last year myself, had a spider, a budgie, and a juvie childrens die in the last year and i also have a beardie who just got over a lung infection. I thought of it like this....... if i was doing something bad then all of my other animals would be dying too.
the beardie getting sick was probably my fault as i only had the heat spot at around 32 degrees and i have been told to bring it up to 40 odd and have completed a course of medication, so all i can do is learn. he is fine now
dont beat your self up over it. like alot of people have said, learn from your mistakes and do better next time.

[Kikkers_mum]

I feel so much better now

I now feel less ashamed when I look at my animals, and feel much more confident that I am not going to let them down.

Thankyou so much everyone!

[Julie-anne]

Last year one of my old housemates found his coastal carpet dead in its enclosure and his girlfriend thought it was the funniest thing ever, her parents were over for dinner and they were laughing too. I'm not sure what caused the snakes death but he was obviously upset about it and all i remember is his girlfriend laughing and saying "You can't even look after a snake!"

Thankfully i haven't experienced this from my loved ones (and like you i would very upset if they did). If you know that you have done your best and did not purposely put the animal in any danger then thats all you could do.

[snakes4me2]

If these partners have a better way to do thngs or they think you are doing something wrong why dont they bring it up before the animal passes or gets very sick????. Could they do any better than you are????. Dont feel ashamed.

[Lurk]

When we have animals or are involved with animals wether it be work or pets or volunteer caring for wild life.These things happen and animals do get sick it does not make you a bad owner if they do.
The main thing to remember is when they get sick figure out why and if it does have something to do with husbandry its up to us to fix that and learn from it.

Dont feel bad
Kylie
P.S It is bad enough loosing a pet/animal we sometimes put guilt on our selves for it.But it is very unfair to put some one down for it when they feel bad enough