I work for the Government Executive...doing what you might ask? Amongst other things, I am a ticket seller....It is my job to sell tickets. I know I have succeeded when I am thanked by the client after receiving a ticket they do not desire. What else? Hmmmm.....I sample peoples breath. If it reaches a number I do not like, I bring them back to work with me for an hour or so. Sometimes if the number is really high, I take things off of them and this makes them mad. Occassionally so mad that they throw up. Then I have to get the cleaner in. Cleaning is not my job. I also get to spend my days driving around aimlessly. This is done in an attempt to curb naughtiness in the not-so-everyday people. That is the magic of the car I drive. Other times I have to talk alot. I get to talk to people of all ages, genders and cultures. I like this bit very much. Alot of people talk really nicely back and this makes me smile. I have helped. Other times people refer to me as some sort fornicating female genetalia porcine person. This bit makes me giggle. They obviously know how much I love sex and bacon. I also have to bury myself in paperwork. I don't mind paperwork. Usually though, just as I am in the throes of wild passionate paperworking, the phone rings and I have to dash off somewhere to talk to more people. Hence my paperwork can get a little behind.
Sometimes I have to run alot. Some of my customers like to play chasey's or hide and seek, and its always the same customers!. I love this game.
And this one time, at band camp, oh no I mean work, this one girl was so wonderful. She had had a bit to drink and was wandering the road so I helped her inside where it was warm. She was so warm that she took all of her clothes off! Then she saw that I was so busy she did not want to interupt me, so she peed in her seat and said, "I'm a classy lady, you cant have me for less than $900" That is alot of money! She really was all class. It is not unusual for me to be the recipient of these kinds of people taking their clothes off. I do not get paid enough.
Anyhow....this is just a tiny sample of what I do that I get paid for.
I'm also a domestic engineer for 7 other people.
In my spare time (BAHAHAHAHAHAHA) I look after and love my gorgeous animals. Horses, snakes, lizards, rottweilers, sheperd cross, some cats, a sheep....and um....thats about it.
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