new years eve question

[darkangel]

this is mainly a question for those of you who have partners. but any advice is welcome!
my b/f's brother is coming to bris from syd for new years eve. do you think it is ok for him to go out and leave me at home with 3 kids by myself? am i being selfish for kicking up a stink about it?
i have no issue with him going out but i think it's a bit wrong to go out on new years eve while i'm home with the kids by myself.

 

[the.badger]

Just because he's going out, doesn't mean you have to be stuck at home with the kids! Get a babysitter and go with them, or go out with the girls instead!

 

[missllama]

selfish and ur only 26 u should be able to go out urself!!! not be a babysitter for the night!!!
unless u wernt doing anything that would be ok only if he asked before he planned the trip not plan the trip and say ill leave the kids with u

 

[darkangel]

his brother said he wanted to come up so my bf said ok. i was told after his brother had already put in his holidays. i don't have anyone to look after the kids and even if i did it's a "boy thing" so wouldn't be invited.

 

[Trouble]

I'm a female, but I reckon just let the guys have a guys night out!! Now it may just be me, but I reckon us girls get more nights out than guys do.
Maybe you & the kids can go & watch the fireworks somewhere. . ?

Just my opinion

 

[kakariki]

I think it was thoughtless BUT if he doesn't see his bro very often he probably just got caught up in the excitement. How old are the kids? Could they share New Years Eve with you all? Babysitters for NYE will be expensive but well worth it if you want to go with them without the kids but imo, the kids make it more special! And kids just looove fireworks!

 

[Renagade]

you should have been invited. kick away. maybe an event where the children were included also would be even better. they probably feel the same way you do. might be rich coming from someone without kids, but valid none the less.
ren

 

[kakariki]

Another option.....grab a girlfriend & take the kids to a fireworks display! Their little faces are just awesome to watch, provided they aren't tiny of course, lol. That wouldn't be so cool!

 

[darkangel]

the boys are 3, 4 and 8. the younger 2 are a bit young to go out with and the 3 yr old is a handful at the best of times lol.

 

[darkangel]

would LOVE to go out to watch the fireworks though.

 

[junglepython2]

No point you both staying home.

 

[kakariki]

3 isn't too young surely? They would love it. Don't stay home & stew about it. My kids are older now (10 & 12) but I have always taken them with me.

 

[the.badger]

Erm OK, I'd be ticked off if I wasn't invited. It would be fine for them to go out and catch up while the bro's down (do some fishing or watch football or whatever it is they do), but I don't think that's what they've got planned for NYE. The one night the entire world is partying is hardly the time to plan a boys night out and not invite your significant other, when you know full well that you can't get a babysitter.

Lame.

 

[Surfcop24]

Darkangel... I agree with you.... But I have to admit..I do occasionally go out with the boys... I do ask first...

Though because his brother is up... He , I am sure wants some bonding time...

3 Kids by yourself at the fireworks...Could be a lil bit of a handful with the crowds that generally happen... So get yourself one of your girlfriends..That loves your kids and isnt doing anything... And maybe go watch the 9pm fireworks....

Or some movies in front of the TV...And when the fireworks come on..turn it up..Kids will love it...

My Lil Man has never been to the NYE fireworks... Too Busy... But has been to Archerfield when the Races and Fireworks are on there.....

 

[Mrs I]

I would be a little ticked off too, any other weekend not such a big deal, but NYE...

Not knowing the situation, maybe BF doesnt understand what its like to have kids .. ?

 

[Sdaji]

I would be a little ticked off too, any other weekend not such a big deal, but NYE...

Not knowing the situation, maybe BF doesnt understand what its like to have kids .. ?

If they're his kids he probably does Of course, they might not be, which might make a difference depending on the couple's ideals and feelings.

I wouldn't exclude my partner from NYE or any other big event, although it's different for different couples. This guy might have said he didn't want kids because they'd hold back his lifestyle, and she might have said "Don't worry, I'll take care of that, you can still have your fun, I want kids and I'm happy to take that responsibility". Of course, she probably didn't, and that means he is probably being pretty selfish.

Unless there is an agreement or understanding in the relationship which makes it okay, it's not very nice for someone to have a boys' night out and exclude his partner when he knows she will be upset about it. It comes down to priorities and looking after your partner. You can have a boys' night out any night (I'm sure the brother isn't down for just one night). An event like NYE should be shared with the partner if he or she thinks it's important.

Just my feelings on the issue

 

[darkangel]

i don't have many friends up here but the ones i do have are either going away or have plans already.
i have been going out a fair bit lately so i'm not going to say to him no sorry u can't go out but i have let him know that i think it's wrong and he should go out on another night instead. but that's not good enough. the worst bit is things have been a bit rocky lately and he's not caring that this is making things worse

 

[darkangel]

he seems to think new years eve is just another night. nothing special etc. my reaction is well if it's no big deal to you then go out the next night. oh but that's not new years eve and dave (his brother) wants to go out for new years.
i have 3 boys. the youngest 2 are his.

 

[Minke]

Unless there is an agreement or understanding in the relationship which makes it okay, it's not very nice for someone to have a boys' night out and exclude his partner when he knows she will be upset about it. It comes down to priorities and looking after your partner. You can have a boys' night out any night (I'm sure the brother isn't down for just one night). An event like NYE should be shared with the partner if he or she thinks it's important.

Just my feelings on the issue

Agreed.

This year will be the first year my husband and i will be able to have NYE together (he's always worked in hospitality management). In the past i have taken my daughter to the 9pm fireworks, but being at home alone at midnight is poo (toasting yourself is just not the same :lol. There is no way in the future either of us will be going out and leaving the other at home with the kids (but i may be placing too much importance on it after 8 years...)

 

[reptilegirl_jordan]

just give the kids a game or something .....lock them in a cage...rip open a 6 pack order some pizza and ur set..