A priest who has been celibant his whole life and is somewhat naive is hitchhiking on the highway and gets a lift from a guy in a big truck, who is smoking a cigar. The priest asks if the driver has a spare cigar and is told to help himself to the box of them in the glove compartment. On opening the glove compartment he find a box of condoms and asks what they are. Realising the priest is naive and not wanting to admit his shameful practice of adultery, he responds "they're for when you smoke ciggarettes in the rain". "what a good idea" says the priest. The truckie drop the priest off in town, goes to a convenience store and asks for a pack of condoms. The store owner is suprised at such a request from a priest and asks "what size" and the priest says "Big enough to fit a camel".
A blonde goes into the drug store to buy some rubbers (so she can practice safe sex). She walks up to the pharmacist and asks "How much for a box of rubbers?" "They're $1 for a box of 3," he replied, "Plus 6 cents for the tax." "Oh," said the blonde, "I always wondered how they kept them on." 
