wattso
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- Aug 1, 2003
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T'was the night before xmasT'was the night befor Xmas, and all through the house
the herps were all feeding, some on rat, some on mouse.
The others they scoffed down their insects with glee
and all else were sleeping excepting for me.
Monty yawned wide,realigning his jaw
When I was distracted, by a knock on the door.
Whilst away to the matter,forgetting the cage
what Monty was up to, I failed to gauge.
Alas, he was up to his normal repast,
seeking means of escape, with that serpentine class.
Having slithered his way from the cage to the bed,
He made himself cosy, just by my wifes head.
Suddenly from the bedroom there arose such a clatter,
that I sprang from my chair, to see what was the matter
A godawful scream rang out in the air
I thought that St Nickolas must be in there.
Away to the bedroom I flew in a flash
Switched on the light, at the sound of a crash
and what to my wandering eyes did appear
The shattered remains of two cartons of beer!
No sign of my fat well fed snake could be found,
Mrs claus on the wardrobe, and wouldnt come down
to my ears came the patter of four little feet
awakened from slumber they started to bleat.
A scaley head then emerged from the sheets
I moved quick to catch it, quite light on my feet
just as I said "there, never mind dear.."
I trod on the shattered remains of my beer.
All stressed out and baking as I was in my suit,
all padded with pillows and bereft of my boots,
A handfull of snake and a footful of glass,
Santa clause, "lost it" then fell on his ****.
With great bellows of pain and no little surprise
he picked out the glass with tears in his eyes
the kids saw the blood and started to ball,
when the wardobe leaned from its place by the wall.
Down came the misses, too quickly to scream,
the presents all followed,like a horrible dream
the kids both screamed and fled to their beds
no visions of sugar plums in their little heads.
The wardrobe was heavy , with the wifes added weight
when it landed on santa, she heard his legs break.
And the Ambo's exclaimed, as we drove out of site
Merry xmas to all, and to all, a goodnight!
