Hahaha try working at a pizza place that stays open till 2am on weekends, that's next to a popular leagues club and walking distance from another pub!! :lol:
Great customer quotes.
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Hahaha try working at a pizza place that stays open till 2am on weekends, that's next to a popular leagues club and walking distance from another pub!! :lol:
Bearded_Lady
Well-Known Member
Amen Kirby! Had the exact same thing happen to me and its funny to watch em squirm when u cant find the disks for them. Gotta love the piles of weekly porn movies some of the oldies return. I wash my hands afterwards lol
Lol
Not a customer, but someone at work calls up on the radio. "What time's the 11 o'clock blast?."
We had another bright fella who was told we had a storm watch on. He asked if it was just thunder or if there was lightening with it. Huh?
blackthorn
Well-Known Member
We have a few bright customers come into work.. if I could only remember all the stupid things people have said.
One senario we get:
"usual answering phone speel"
Customer: can I get a large pizza, half meat lovers, half supreme
"was that for pick up or delivery?"
Customer: I'll pick it up
"sure, no worries, was that everything tonight?"
Customer: and a garlic bread thanks.
"alright, can I get a name for the order?"
Customer: Paul
"and a contact number"
Customer: phone number
"I'll just find out how long on that one for you"
....
"that should be ready in about 20mins"
Customer: Thanks, bye.
......
an hour later they we get a phone call
Customer: Hi, my name's Paul, I ordered a pizza about an hour ago and it's not here... I was told it would be 20mins.
"um.... are you sure that was a delivery?"
Customer: yes.
"well, we've got that here as a take away"
Customer: it was definitely delivery
"did you give us an address?"
Customer: no, we should be in your system
"we don't have a computer system, it's all hand written, so if you didn't give us an address, then we can't deliver it. The staff member who took your order would've asked you if it was a pick up"
... then there's either a heated argument or they back down and realise they're stupid.
another one we get sometimes is:
Customer: Can I get a take away, pick up pizza to be delivered thanks.
"umm...??"
and:
Customer walks in to pick up there order, and a staff member rings it into the till...
"That comes to $36 all together"
Customer: Oh and I have one of these (hands over a dine-in only voucher over)
"sorry, that vouchers for dine-in only"
Customer: (staring at their voucher and flipping it over to read it) it doesn't say that...
"it doesn't actually say it on the voucher, but it does say subject to rules and conditions, so if you have a look at the rules in the front of the voucher book, it explains it there"
Customer: I have read the rules and it says it's for take aways
"actually, our restaurant is in the casual dining section of the book, and that whole section is excluded from take away and delivery"
Customer: (still don't believe you and start to kick up a stink) I'm sure it's for take away, it doesn't say that it's not for dine in (go to grab out their own books to prove you wrong.)
... this is when I grab out our laminated page of rules and conditions with underlined and high lighted sections proving them wrong saying "it's on page 3, section 12 of your book, right here. You can't use this voucher for take away"
Usually by then they're really pissed off and generally swear at you - when you work it out, the amount they're spending and the amount they would save using the voucher is like $8... wow!
We get all sorts of dramas with that dine-in only voucher, I hate it... and some people get so worked up over a few dollars, it's crazy. A lot of peole are fine about not being able to use it, and some aren't so happy, but they don't cause a fuss, and then there's the people that get really fired up and swear at you and storm out.
There's heaps more, but I can't remember half of them well enough.
One senario we get:
"usual answering phone speel"
Customer: can I get a large pizza, half meat lovers, half supreme
"was that for pick up or delivery?"
Customer: I'll pick it up
"sure, no worries, was that everything tonight?"
Customer: and a garlic bread thanks.
"alright, can I get a name for the order?"
Customer: Paul
"and a contact number"
Customer: phone number
"I'll just find out how long on that one for you"
....
"that should be ready in about 20mins"
Customer: Thanks, bye.
......
an hour later they we get a phone call
Customer: Hi, my name's Paul, I ordered a pizza about an hour ago and it's not here... I was told it would be 20mins.
"um.... are you sure that was a delivery?"
Customer: yes.
"well, we've got that here as a take away"
Customer: it was definitely delivery
"did you give us an address?"
Customer: no, we should be in your system
"we don't have a computer system, it's all hand written, so if you didn't give us an address, then we can't deliver it. The staff member who took your order would've asked you if it was a pick up"
... then there's either a heated argument or they back down and realise they're stupid.
another one we get sometimes is:
Customer: Can I get a take away, pick up pizza to be delivered thanks.
"umm...??"
and:
Customer walks in to pick up there order, and a staff member rings it into the till...
"That comes to $36 all together"
Customer: Oh and I have one of these (hands over a dine-in only voucher over)
"sorry, that vouchers for dine-in only"
Customer: (staring at their voucher and flipping it over to read it) it doesn't say that...
"it doesn't actually say it on the voucher, but it does say subject to rules and conditions, so if you have a look at the rules in the front of the voucher book, it explains it there"
Customer: I have read the rules and it says it's for take aways
"actually, our restaurant is in the casual dining section of the book, and that whole section is excluded from take away and delivery"
Customer: (still don't believe you and start to kick up a stink) I'm sure it's for take away, it doesn't say that it's not for dine in (go to grab out their own books to prove you wrong.)
... this is when I grab out our laminated page of rules and conditions with underlined and high lighted sections proving them wrong saying "it's on page 3, section 12 of your book, right here. You can't use this voucher for take away"
Usually by then they're really pissed off and generally swear at you - when you work it out, the amount they're spending and the amount they would save using the voucher is like $8... wow!
We get all sorts of dramas with that dine-in only voucher, I hate it... and some people get so worked up over a few dollars, it's crazy. A lot of peole are fine about not being able to use it, and some aren't so happy, but they don't cause a fuss, and then there's the people that get really fired up and swear at you and storm out.
There's heaps more, but I can't remember half of them well enough.
Craig2
Very Well-Known Member
I manage a towing company among others
the best one i have heard
turned up to an accident with the truck driver
Single vehicle stuck in a DITCH/PADDOCK
went to speak to driver
ME : hello hows it goin bet you did not expect to be here tonight
HER: look i aint got much money so ill tell you what
YOU GET ME OUT, ILL GET YOU OFF
It was about the best job ive been on that one.+
the best one i have heard
turned up to an accident with the truck driver
Single vehicle stuck in a DITCH/PADDOCK
went to speak to driver
ME : hello hows it goin bet you did not expect to be here tonight
HER: look i aint got much money so ill tell you what
YOU GET ME OUT, ILL GET YOU OFF
It was about the best job ive been on that one.+
Moreliaman
Very Well-Known Member
I had a customer buy an airstone for his fishtank & then phone up the next day telling me he'd pop it into his tank & watched the airstone for 2 hours & not 1 bubble came out !!! (didnt realise you needed an air pump too)
Also had 2 guys looking at an air curtian (dressed in suits so youd have thought there would have been some intelligence there) after looking at it for about 10 mins 1 of them asked......"how do they fit all the air in there then ?"
Also had 2 guys looking at an air curtian (dressed in suits so youd have thought there would have been some intelligence there) after looking at it for about 10 mins 1 of them asked......"how do they fit all the air in there then ?"
reptilegirl_jordan
Very Well-Known Member
hahaha classic
redbellybite
Almost Legendary
have you ever thought its probably the way she "pays" for all her contractors :lol:....keeping up with the dominoes pizza add motto "whats in the box with the dots"
Sturdy
Very Well-Known Member
I gotta get into tow truck driving.
Dipcdame
Very Well-Known Member
What a giggle!! Sounds like some of these customers would be prime candidates fro the yearly Darwin Awards!!!!! LOL
jakethesnake
Not so new Member
Phone customer: Hi, do you have any neon tetras?
Jake: Yes
Customer: How big are they?
Jake: About 2.5cm
Customer: Oh, so they're still the same size as this morning???
Jake: Yes
Customer: How big are they?
Jake: About 2.5cm
Customer: Oh, so they're still the same size as this morning???
abbott75
Very Well-Known Member
My new job is in a LFS, so I'm getting used to these...
sarah_m
Very Well-Known Member
I had a client come in for a large amount of waxing. Just making conversation i asked her "so do you have any plans for the rest of your day?"
She said "well my boy friend is paying for the waxing so i think we are going to get a room after this" ................... OK, sorry i asked!
Then i went out while she got dressed and asked her boyfriend what her last name is so i could put her into our computer system, and he said he didnt know her last name....................
Again, sorry i asked!
She said "well my boy friend is paying for the waxing so i think we are going to get a room after this" ................... OK, sorry i asked!
Then i went out while she got dressed and asked her boyfriend what her last name is so i could put her into our computer system, and he said he didnt know her last name....................
Again, sorry i asked!
sarah_m
Very Well-Known Member
Also her a "woman" call and ask if we do brazillian waxing. Yes we do thats fine, i am making her appointment and she says "i'm actually a transexual, will this be a problem?':shock::shock::shock:
I told her i was sorry but none of us do male brazilians, to which she replied "but i am living as a woman full time"
Didnt seam to understand that it wasnt the clothes she chose to wear that i had a problem with. I tried to tell "her" again that we are not qualified to do that sort of male waxing.
Then said "oh but what am i going to do, it has been a while since my last wax, i am so overgrown and i like it to be all nice and smooth down there"
TOO MUCH INFORMATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I told her i was sorry but none of us do male brazilians, to which she replied "but i am living as a woman full time"
Didnt seam to understand that it wasnt the clothes she chose to wear that i had a problem with. I tried to tell "her" again that we are not qualified to do that sort of male waxing.
Then said "oh but what am i going to do, it has been a while since my last wax, i am so overgrown and i like it to be all nice and smooth down there"
TOO MUCH INFORMATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Twin_Rivers
Active Member
I have some interesting customers in my store, I recently had a customer come in for the first time, we have been open for almost a year:-
Customer:- first time i have been in here.
Me: great welcome feel free to look around if you need any help let me know bla bla bla
Customer; you should of set up closer to the main shopping centre (2 blocks away) i would be in all the time then.
me:- sorry but this was the only shop front on the main hwy suitable at the time we set up.
Customer: if you were down there I would come in all the time, I have to go to Dubbo to get my stuff now because your to far out of the way.
Me: I am sorry that I have inconveinenced you.
Dubbo is 45minutes drive from here.
Our other issue in a small town is people expect us to be more expensive than bigger stores in major centres, examples:
customer: how much are your Jackall's (lures not actual jackal's)
me: $24.25 each
customer: I only pay $29.95 in Dubbo
Me: sorry sir I will match that price for you.
Customer: nah i don't want one.
New Customer: Excuse me do you have Japanese fighting fish,
me: I think you mean siamese fighting fish and yes we have them.
Customer: Jap siamese same thing.
Me (deep breath) yes sir they are just over here.
Customer : how much?
me $5.95 each.
Customer: your a *******ing rip off i'm going to Dubbo to get one.
2 hours later he returned and bought a Siamese fighting fish, plus had wasted $25 of petrol driving to Dubbo.
I could go on all day with customer quotes, but for every bad customer there are 10+ good ones which makes it worth while.
Cheers,
Phil
Customer:- first time i have been in here.
Me: great welcome feel free to look around if you need any help let me know bla bla bla
Customer; you should of set up closer to the main shopping centre (2 blocks away) i would be in all the time then.
me:- sorry but this was the only shop front on the main hwy suitable at the time we set up.
Customer: if you were down there I would come in all the time, I have to go to Dubbo to get my stuff now because your to far out of the way.
Me: I am sorry that I have inconveinenced you.
Dubbo is 45minutes drive from here.
Our other issue in a small town is people expect us to be more expensive than bigger stores in major centres, examples:
customer: how much are your Jackall's (lures not actual jackal's)
me: $24.25 each
customer: I only pay $29.95 in Dubbo
Me: sorry sir I will match that price for you.
Customer: nah i don't want one.
New Customer: Excuse me do you have Japanese fighting fish,
me: I think you mean siamese fighting fish and yes we have them.
Customer: Jap siamese same thing.
Me (deep breath) yes sir they are just over here.
Customer : how much?
me $5.95 each.
Customer: your a *******ing rip off i'm going to Dubbo to get one.
2 hours later he returned and bought a Siamese fighting fish, plus had wasted $25 of petrol driving to Dubbo.
I could go on all day with customer quotes, but for every bad customer there are 10+ good ones which makes it worth while.
Cheers,
Phil
S
Snowman
Guest
:shock:'m a sparky...
Customer: can you run a bare 240v wire infont of my aviary... Cat's keep scaring my birds" Me: :shock: Um no that's illegal, and I'd probably get charged with man slaughter at some stage.
Customer: that's ridiculous. I'll do it myself.....
Customer: can you run a bare 240v wire infont of my aviary... Cat's keep scaring my birds" Me: :shock: Um no that's illegal, and I'd probably get charged with man slaughter at some stage.
Customer: that's ridiculous. I'll do it myself.....
Hooglabah
Very Well-Known Member
im confused do you sell fishing tackle or tropical fish???
Twin_Rivers
Active Member
"im confused do you sell fishing tackle or tropical fish??? "
I sell fishing tackle, boating equipment, camping equipment, aquariums and fish (tropical and cold not marine) I sell incense and gifts thats about it really, as a small town between two major rural centres we need a diverse range of products.
Strange shop but currently working for us
cheers,
Phil
I sell fishing tackle, boating equipment, camping equipment, aquariums and fish (tropical and cold not marine) I sell incense and gifts thats about it really, as a small town between two major rural centres we need a diverse range of products.
Strange shop but currently working for us
cheers,
Phil
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