New Blondes

[SlothHead]

I place this thread here in Herp Help because as the description says, "Questions and answers about reptile related problems."

And this is a question about a reptile RELATED problem.

All you married people, we as men need a solution, I lie, i as a "in the dog box (or soon to be) " husband needs a solution

I have just paid for and will receive two blondes on friday.

What do i do? I havent told the wife.

My options
a) run the gauntlet, and pretend like they were always there, even though they are totally different from the rest of the collection;

b) pretend the that money missing from the account was to sponsor aid relief in a third world country and as a complementary gift they have sent me some snakes;

c) tell her and get the latest cook book in preparation for the next month of cooking that i will have to do;

d) attempt to convince her that now the economies of scale are greatly in our favour and acquiring and studying these animals would benefit society greatly, plus add to our financial situation when they breed;

or
e) hand the divorce papers to her now, signed with a note saying "i understand if you must sign as this addiction has become somewhat like air to me"

Men, we/ I need answers. Time is short

Signing off, a fallen soldier

D

 

[dragozz]

i'de go for d (without the benefiting society bit ) hehe

 

[ex1dic]

a! more fun

 

[freddy]

:shock: LMAO:lol: , go for 'B' would love to see the look on her face when you try explaining it to her

 

[DiamondAsh]

A ..... take your chances .... or E ... tell her they must have bred while you weren't looking.

 

[junglist*]

Bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb

 

[SlothHead]

Would it be ok to sit in the corner rocking back and forth dribbling on myself, mumbling etc.

Then slowly come out and say that i am just a bit stressed at work, this will certainly buy time, but then again, with her working in medicine, i could end up in a padded cell.

Options, damn i really need some options

D

 

[ScorpionKing]

c, but buy the cook book now.... start cooking today before they arrive....

 

[snakes4me2]

Just make sure you have a dirty great big bunch of flowers sitting on the table, (if your like me and never buy her flowers she will know your up to something ) then you just have to put up with the silent treatment for a day or two and then they get over it.

Jobs done (until next time) Good luck and be sure to let us know how ya go with her :lol:

I have allways worked on the theory *if in doubt go C* seems to work most of the time

 

[tan]

LMAO Tell her you bought them as a present for her!!

 

[snakes4me2]

LMAO Tell her you bought them as a present for her!!

Hey tan you are good

Would really love to see you try A:lol: :lol:

 

[RevDaniel]

Lets just hope that my girlfriend doesn't read this or she might get the idea of not ever marrying me. Allready i am planning to buy another 7 snakes to my collection of 13 snakes. She is being very patient with the snakes i currently own but now i am walking on eggshells with the snakes i will be getting in the next few weeks. Good thing the kids like my snakes. Our daughter jessica says good morning and goodnight to the snakes every day

 

[bredli84]

im with tan, such beautiful snakes could only make her happy. oh, and say they were a pressie for some obscure aniversary so that she feels bad for forgetting and to make it up to will cook u ur favourite meal for dinner

 

[popeye]

mate tella your the boss and to do as she is told,

 

[bluebear]

deleted

 

[Hsut77]

go with e mate, sorry your done for!!!!!

 

[SlothHead]

mate tella your the boss and to do as she is told

Yeah i can see this working.... wait i am imagining it right now

I reckon it would go down like:

"Look HON-EY, I am the BOSS"

This is what would happen, one of these:
a) She would look at me, look around the room befuddled then probably turn to me and ask
"Who are you talking to"

b) "Not while i am wearing the girls body"

c) Sneeze then say, "Sorry i am allurgic to bull****"

d) Smile at me delightfully, hug me, "I know you darling, I dont really mind". Then she would shower me in gifts, paid from my account, things like, a new pair of high heels, a new bag, maybe a new dress.ooooh earings.

e) Look at me sternly " You know darling, i thought you were just about to say something intelligent"

or

f) Look quizickly at me shaking her head "If you had half a brain, it would be lonely, now take out the garbage"

Man i really could be done for, this is no ordinary woman, its the wife. She has half my stuff now.

There is no turning back

D

 

[DiamondAsh]

Yeah i can see this working.... wait i am imagining it right now

I reckon it would go down like:

"Look HON-EY, I am the BOSS"

This is what would happen, one of these:
a) She would look at me, look around the room befuddled then probably turn to me and ask
"Who are you talking to"

b) "Not while i am wearing the girls body"

c) Sneeze then say, "Sorry i am allurgic to bull****"

d) Smile at me delightfully, hug me, "I know you darling, I dont really mind". Then she would shower me in gifts, paid from my account, things like, a new pair of high heels, a new bag, maybe a new dress.ooooh earings.

e) Look at me sternly " You know darling, i thought you were just about to say something intelligent"

or

f) Look quizickly at me shaking her head "If you had half a brain, it would be lonely, now take out the garbage"

Man i really could be done for, this is no ordinary woman, its the wife. She has half my stuff now.

There is no turning back

D

You forgot G ... when you wake up in hospital, but can't see as the swelling hasn't gone down yet .....

 

[SlothHead]

h) "I know you are honey, go and sit down, i will make you a special cup of tea"

 

[Garry2]

tell her quick and then take whats coming....short and sweet we hope....do it with confidence maybe youwill get away with it.....